when it all seems to be a battle - Long Distance Love

Missing you.... · 10-28-2009, 06:26 PM

what do you girls do when the separation has taken it toll and then some? when your whole relationship seems to be a constant battle you know you love him and and your both willing to make it work but its just not clicking yet..... so here it is Im supposed to be moving with DH to n.c. in a few weeks but ever since he came home from AIT nothing is the same and we just fight and I dont know if we need more time or this is just it, we have a daughter and i want to make it work not only for her but because i know how much i truly love him I'm just worried about moving up there and then it not working out and being well stuck any words of wisdom?

Mrs.Nimkumpoop · 10-28-2009, 06:28 PM

After being separated and then going straight back into living with someone can sometimes take a period of readjustment. If you married him and have a child together, don't you think you owe it to yourselves to try and make it work? You say you love him, and you married him for that reason, so I don't see why you wouldn't give it your all to keep trying to make it work. Only certain circumstances would make me change my opinion on that. Is this an ongoing thing? Have you always fought this much? How long have you been back together under the same roof for?

Missing you.... · 10-28-2009, 06:30 PM

I feel like I have been and talking about walking away not yet at least I just dont know how to make this readjustment work for him

Mrs.Nimkumpoop · 10-28-2009, 06:31 PM

Originally Posted by Missing you....

I feel like I have been and talking about walking away not yet at least I just dont know how to make this readjustment work for him

How long have you been back together for? How long has the fighting been going on?

Missing you.... · 10-28-2009, 06:33 PM

well it actually started right before he left AIT so about 2 months now I know its not that long but that's ALL we do he doesn't even want to be "intimate" with me anymore

Mrs.Nimkumpoop · 10-28-2009, 06:34 PM

Have ya'll sat down and had a real conversation about it?

Missing you.... · 10-28-2009, 06:35 PM

ya and it always ends in a yelling match I want this to work so badly and he claims he does to but im starting to doubt it all

Mrs.Nimkumpoop · 10-28-2009, 06:38 PM

I think ya'll need to set aside a time and sit down together and agree to listen to each other. Have one of you start and say everything your feeling while the other one sits there and listens, and until you're done talking, the other can't say a word. Then reverse it. I think the problem might be that you're not able to communicate, and if you force each other to listen without interruption it might help.

Missing you.... · 10-28-2009, 06:40 PM

thanks! i think your right about the communication part its weird because that was always so strong in our relationship before i dont know where it changed but we have to get on the right track

Mrs.Nimkumpoop · 10-28-2009, 06:43 PM

Sometimes separation can cause a break-down in communication, the best thing you can do is try to get it back, because without it your relationship will just get filled with misunderstandings and fights. I really hope the talk works for you guys

10-28-2009, 06:26 PM	#1 (permalink)
Missing you.... Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Hawaii Posts: 92 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 17% Longevity: 11%	when it all seems to be a battle what do you girls do when the separation has taken it toll and then some? when your whole relationship seems to be a constant battle you know you love him and and your both willing to make it work but its just not clicking yet..... so here it is Im supposed to be moving with DH to n.c. in a few weeks but ever since he came home from AIT nothing is the same and we just fight and I dont know if we need more time or this is just it, we have a daughter and i want to make it work not only for her but because i know how much i truly love him I'm just worried about moving up there and then it not working out and being well stuck any words of wisdom?

10-28-2009, 06:28 PM	#2 (permalink)
Mrs.Nimkumpoop What gave u the impression that I give a damn what u think? Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: For once there's no HIM and ME, it's US =): Honolulu, HI Posts: 13,204 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 69% Longevity: 20%	After being separated and then going straight back into living with someone can sometimes take a period of readjustment. If you married him and have a child together, don't you think you owe it to yourselves to try and make it work? You say you love him, and you married him for that reason, so I don't see why you wouldn't give it your all to keep trying to make it work. Only certain circumstances would make me change my opinion on that. Is this an ongoing thing? Have you always fought this much? How long have you been back together under the same roof for? __________________ Formerly known as ~Mrs.Andy~ I have 45 wives. You know who you are. I love you all I also love my twin GuamAliAma, my twinner [JJ], and my mistress Hope.

10-28-2009, 06:34 PM	#6 (permalink)
Mrs.Nimkumpoop What gave u the impression that I give a damn what u think? Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: For once there's no HIM and ME, it's US =): Honolulu, HI Posts: 13,204 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 69% Longevity: 20%	Have ya'll sat down and had a real conversation about it? __________________ Formerly known as ~Mrs.Andy~ I have 45 wives. You know who you are. I love you all I also love my twin GuamAliAma, my twinner [JJ], and my mistress Hope.

10-28-2009, 06:38 PM	#8 (permalink)
Mrs.Nimkumpoop What gave u the impression that I give a damn what u think? Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: For once there's no HIM and ME, it's US =): Honolulu, HI Posts: 13,204 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 69% Longevity: 20%	I think ya'll need to set aside a time and sit down together and agree to listen to each other. Have one of you start and say everything your feeling while the other one sits there and listens, and until you're done talking, the other can't say a word. Then reverse it. I think the problem might be that you're not able to communicate, and if you force each other to listen without interruption it might help. __________________ Formerly known as ~Mrs.Andy~ I have 45 wives. You know who you are. I love you all I also love my twin GuamAliAma, my twinner [JJ], and my mistress Hope.

10-28-2009, 06:43 PM	#10 (permalink)
Mrs.Nimkumpoop What gave u the impression that I give a damn what u think? Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: For once there's no HIM and ME, it's US =): Honolulu, HI Posts: 13,204 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 69% Longevity: 20%	Sometimes separation can cause a break-down in communication, the best thing you can do is try to get it back, because without it your relationship will just get filled with misunderstandings and fights. I really hope the talk works for you guys __________________ Formerly known as ~Mrs.Andy~ I have 45 wives. You know who you are. I love you all I also love my twin GuamAliAma, my twinner [JJ], and my mistress Hope.

About Us

MilitarySOS Shortcuts

MilitarySOS Help

About MilitarySOS

10-28-2009, 06:30 PM	#3 (permalink)
Missing you.... Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Hawaii Posts: 92 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 17% Longevity: 11%	I feel like I have been and talking about walking away not yet at least I just dont know how to make this readjustment work for him

10-28-2009, 06:33 PM	#5 (permalink)
Missing you.... Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Hawaii Posts: 92 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 17% Longevity: 11%	well it actually started right before he left AIT so about 2 months now I know its not that long but that's ALL we do he doesn't even want to be "intimate" with me anymore

10-28-2009, 06:35 PM	#7 (permalink)
Missing you.... Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Hawaii Posts: 92 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 17% Longevity: 11%	ya and it always ends in a yelling match I want this to work so badly and he claims he does to but im starting to doubt it all

10-28-2009, 06:40 PM	#9 (permalink)
Missing you.... Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Hawaii Posts: 92 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 17% Longevity: 11%	thanks! i think your right about the communication part its weird because that was always so strong in our relationship before i dont know where it changed but we have to get on the right track