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Thread: Where do you start?

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    Fisheswife's Avatar
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    #1

    Where do you start?

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    So Dh and I have had a few issues. Well I think the straw that is breaking the camels back has just happened. Granted none of the previous issues are huge but his mother was just here and it has been a disaster all over again. For years we have gotten along and everything but in the past year or so it has gone down hill. I am starting to see things that I don't want to be around let alone its like they don't know who I am, or don't want to know who I am. I think both dh and I have seen that if things were to end it will be due to his family. I don't want to see them again right now. I don't want them in my house and if they were to come into my house I would just leave while they are here. I don't mean like get a hotel type thing i mean I don't want to be around them.

    I am starting to think about really ending this. His mother of course doesn't want to see him hurt and fine with me so let me end this now since apparently I am not the person who should be with him. I don't want to drag out a marriage that she is not fully on board with anymore.

    So where to I begin. I don't work right now since there is nothing really available. Do I move back to mom and dad's for a while and get a job out there. How did you start over? I really have no clue where to begin.
  2. "If you don't like my attitude, quit talking to me"
    TrishAFSpouse's Avatar
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    #2
    Why does it matter what she thinks?

    Have you talked to your husband to see where he stands. See if he is able to continue a marriage in which you and his mother may not get along (because in several years from now you could get along).

    Why are you so quick to jump ship just because you had a falling out with his mother?

    Have you both tried counseling to talk it all out?

    There are 10 types of people in the world, those that understand binary and those that don't
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    #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Fisheswife View Post
    So Dh and I have had a few issues. Well I think the straw that is breaking the camels back has just happened. Granted none of the previous issues are huge but his mother was just here and it has been a disaster all over again. For years we have gotten along and everything but in the past year or so it has gone down hill. I am starting to see things that I don't want to be around let alone its like they don't know who I am, or don't want to know who I am. I think both dh and I have seen that if things were to end it will be due to his family. I don't want to see them again right now. I don't want them in my house and if they were to come into my house I would just leave while they are here. I don't mean like get a hotel type thing i mean I don't want to be around them.

    I am starting to think about really ending this. His mother of course doesn't want to see him hurt and fine with me so let me end this now since apparently I am not the person who should be with him. I don't want to drag out a marriage that she is not fully on board with anymore.

    So where to I begin. I don't work right now since there is nothing really available. Do I move back to mom and dad's for a while and get a job out there. How did you start over? I really have no clue where to begin.
    Are you wanting to end things because things are not right for you and your DH or because of his family
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    #4
    We have been dealing with things for a while now. He is all talk and no action and has been but my point was more looking for help of where to start. Not to hash out issues that have been going in circles for a while now. At the end of the day both he and I agreed we would rather things end on better notes than drag things out horribly.
  5. "If you don't like my attitude, quit talking to me"
    TrishAFSpouse's Avatar
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    #5
    If it were me and I had to start over, I would work on getting myself to a place of financial stability.

    If that meant sticking in the marriage (or living with him) until I found a job and got on my feet then that is what I would do.

    If it meant moving back to my home town (not necessarily IN with my family, but near them) to have emotional support while trying to find a job, I would do that.

    You have to ask yourself where do you want to be. If you want to stay where you are, then you have to figure out how to get an income. If you don't want to be there but want to be somewhere else, then figure out what would entail moving and go from there.

    It really does depend on the person. What works for one, may not work for another.

    There are 10 types of people in the world, those that understand binary and those that don't
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    #6
    Why does your husband think he should only be married to someone that his mother approves of?

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