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Thread: Why I Walked Away Without Regrets...

  1. Ambitiously Blonde
    Ambzie's Avatar
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    Apr 2011
    Me: Mississippi

    Why I Walked Away Without Regrets...

    So, some of you are my friends on facebook and saw the big "change" today. The change from "in a relationship" to "single".

    I thought I'd post what happened because here I can tell the "whole" story without backlash from his family members for exposing him. So please, no mention of this post there. I just needed to get this all out.

    Eric and I started out as the typical average happy go lucky couple. Everything was fine.

    Four months ago, Everything turned sour.

    He began to cuss me out when I wanted to go and see my other family members. He would cuss me out when I didn't cook the right thing or fast enough.

    Then...the hitting began. The first time he hit me we were heading back from my cousins and I told him that I wanted to go with my mom to a festival the next day. He hit me in the side of the head with a pair of sunglasses so hard that my head bounced off the driver side window. YES, I was driving!! I would get hit for the same stupid reasons, just different occasions. I began recording him. I began videoing his behavior. I have it all documented. And you wanna know the main reason I wanted it documented? In case he hurt me so bad I was hospitalized or family would have some closure, they'd have evidence on what happened to me and the life I was hiding from them.

    If I didn't want to have sex with him...he would force me.

    When the Steel Magnolias movie with Queen Latifah premiered on Lifetime, I told him I was going to watch it with my mom. He got so angry that after shoving me into the wall, he grabbed a steel fence post that was on our carport and chased me with it.

    We went to Nashville last week to a Steelers game. Because I refused to leave the game and walk with him to smoke (I do not smoke) he elbowed me so hard he bruised some ribs. He did this in front of several witnesses. A few of them asked me if I wanted them to call police and like a fool- I declined.

    The final straw came yesterday when he cussed me out for him oversleeping. He was cussing me on the phone and I didn't realize one of my coworkers was behind me. I work for the freakin' police department, so an officer heard his verbal abuse and his threat to "take care of it when I got home". I couldn't hide it anymore. It was out in the open and I felt exposed. I broke down and told the officer everything that was going on and realized that the life I was living was the same life I encouraged women to get out of. If I continued I'd be a hypocrite or he'd continue and something terrible would happen.

    So. I broke it off yesterday. I finally told my parents what was going on, I let them listen to recordings and I asked him to get his things out by this weekend. I'm staying with my parents currently. He has called me a hundred times today telling me that he's sorry, he'll get help, he'll get medication, he'll fix it...and I'm just not interested.

    Walking away has given me a sense of relief that I can't even explain. It feels so good to know I'm

    I blocked him from calling me/contacting me so now it's been peaceful for the most part.

    I'm writing this to maybe give someone else the strength to get out of a relationship like this. It may seem like it's impossible to get away, but it's NOT. You can find the strength, look within yourself and realize you are worth SO much more. You deserve to be treated like a human being with love and compassion. Being hit or verbally abused is NOT acceptable and it will NOT get better. I try to fool myself into thinking I was happy. I fooled my family & friends into thinking I was happy when in reality, I was drowning in my own tears every night. So please...find your inner strength if you are going through this...walk away and get help because there's no sense in domestic violence.

    And there it is. The reason I walked away with no regrets, and I'll continue putting one foot in front of the other...
  2. Account Closed
    Yabos's Avatar
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    May 2011
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    Oh my God. I had no idea.

    I am so sorry! You deserve so much more than that. Good for you for getting out of that situation.
  3. Anchored2aSailor's Avatar
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    Jun 2010
    Connecticut Bitches!

    I am so proud of you for getting yourself out of that situation. I can't even imagine what you must have been going through/dealing with. I'm so sorry that he did such terrible things to you.

    I'm glad that you have your family's support and assistance during this time, and I am thankful that your co-worker overheard the phone call, and that you finally felt like you could put your situation out there and break free.

    You deserve so much more and so much better. I'm so glad you are safe now.
  4. In vino veritas
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    Nov 2010
    SO proud of you for realizing you are worth more than that.
  5. Account Closed
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    Nov 2010
    Last edited by AwwSnail; 10-27-2012 at 06:20 PM.
  6. Senior Member
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    Jul 2011
    Together in the Hood!
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    You go girl! You don't deserve that, no one does. I know I don't know you... but I'm *SO* proud of you for walking away.
  7. Senior Member
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    Feb 2012
    I hope you realize what a strong woman you are! I am sorry that you had to be put through this. No woman or man for that matter should ever have to put up with domestic violence. I am proud of you for standing on your own to feet and moving on from this relationship. Know that each day will get better.
  8. Regular Member
    Jillybean88's Avatar
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    Jun 2010
    You are so strong to walk away from that situation.
  9. Justice Beaver: The Crime Fighting Beaver
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    Oct 2011
    You are so strong. Good for you!

  10. Senior Member
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    Jun 2012
    Oh my gosh, how terrible! Good for you for realizing that you deserve better, and having the strength and courage to leave.
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