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Thread: I'm getting stronger...

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    Ms. Midwest's Avatar
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    #1

    I'm getting stronger...

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    Okay a little backstory...my ex DB moved out of our place in September...we tried to make a go at things several times after that...we were off and on, back and forth...he wasn't making an effort...but sometimes he was, blah blah blah...

    Well needless to say this was TEARING me apart...I cried alot and I just wasn't healing. Last Tuesday I decided I had enough, I decided it was time to move on and start feeling better and the only way to do that was to cut ties with him for awhile. I called him last week and asked him to stop calling and texting me and I didn't want to hang out any more. He took it okay, he admitted it sucked and he would miss me but he understood.

    Well, after that initial conversation he started to blow up his FB...like status updates EVERY day and sometimes two a day. This may not sound weird, but he is the kind of person who probably hasn't updated his fb status that many times in it's whole existence (he never gets on fb and never posts, has pictures anything) well now there are status updates about how much fun he is having, pictures of him with some friends and even a girl (which suprisingly didn't bother me) posts on other peoples walls and statuses etc etc...

    Now apparently life is pretty amazing without me and he is having a grand time...but he has SOOO much time on his hands that he can update his fb 20 times a day? weird

    Anyway on to me being stronger...last night while on a date ( a pretty good one actually) I get a text from him all it says is "hi" Immediately my heart drops...since we cut off contact I have done really well I have started to heal and I am feeling good...but that one little text made it all flood back...so I made a decision right then and there...I was going to ignore it... I don't want him to have the satisfaction of upsetting me. So then in the course of the rest of the night I get 3 more texts "I miss my puppy" "Alot" "Sorry for texting you, I know I am not supposed to" yet I still continue to ignore Go me!

    Then I got home from my date (yes there will be a 2nd date ) I got on fb before bed and literally minutes after the last text from the ex he updated his fb status and it said something about "oooooohhhhh yaaaaaa...good times" so apparently he was drinking or having a great time?

    The great part is, seeing all these fb status updates in my feed doesn't make me feel bad, seeing him taking pictures with these new friends of his doesn't bother me...it makes me realize how much he has changed and how we are both in such different places...I'm coming to grips with it and feeling alot better.

    I think I will be sad about losing what we once had for quite some time....but I am definitely ready to heal and move on with my life...it feels pretty darn great actually
  2. I'm sorry for the things I said when I was hungry.
    Whitla's Avatar
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    #2


    best post ever. i'm really proud of you




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    #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Midwest View Post
    Okay a little backstory...my ex DB moved out of our place in September...we tried to make a go at things several times after that...we were off and on, back and forth...he wasn't making an effort...but sometimes he was, blah blah blah...

    Well needless to say this was TEARING me apart...I cried alot and I just wasn't healing. Last Tuesday I decided I had enough, I decided it was time to move on and start feeling better and the only way to do that was to cut ties with him for awhile. I called him last week and asked him to stop calling and texting me and I didn't want to hang out any more. He took it okay, he admitted it sucked and he would miss me but he understood.

    Well, after that initial conversation he started to blow up his FB...like status updates EVERY day and sometimes two a day. This may not sound weird, but he is the kind of person who probably hasn't updated his fb status that many times in it's whole existence (he never gets on fb and never posts, has pictures anything) well now there are status updates about how much fun he is having, pictures of him with some friends and even a girl (which suprisingly didn't bother me) posts on other peoples walls and statuses etc etc...

    Now apparently life is pretty amazing without me and he is having a grand time...but he has SOOO much time on his hands that he can update his fb 20 times a day? weird

    Anyway on to me being stronger...last night while on a date ( a pretty good one actually) I get a text from him all it says is "hi" Immediately my heart drops...since we cut off contact I have done really well I have started to heal and I am feeling good...but that one little text made it all flood back...so I made a decision right then and there...I was going to ignore it... I don't want him to have the satisfaction of upsetting me. So then in the course of the rest of the night I get 3 more texts "I miss my puppy" "Alot" "Sorry for texting you, I know I am not supposed to" yet I still continue to ignore Go me!

    Then I got home from my date (yes there will be a 2nd date ) I got on fb before bed and literally minutes after the last text from the ex he updated his fb status and it said something about "oooooohhhhh yaaaaaa...good times" so apparently he was drinking or having a great time?

    The great part is, seeing all these fb status updates in my feed doesn't make me feel bad, seeing him taking pictures with these new friends of his doesn't bother me...it makes me realize how much he has changed and how we are both in such different places...I'm coming to grips with it and feeling alot better.
    I think I will be sad about losing what we once had for quite some time....but I am definitely ready to heal and move on with my life...it feels pretty darn great actually
    Good for you!!! And I feel the same way as the bolded. Mine never used to get on FB either and since we broke he's constantly updating and commenting on everyones stuff and writing things that are VERY out of character for him, or at least what I thought was out of character for him. And instead of it upsetting me it's just helping me move on because I realize I don't want to be with someone like that anyway and how much he's changed.

    I'm so happy for you and glad you're looking at it with this attitude!!
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    #4
    Good for you! I'm sure that hasn't been easy to conquer but sounds like you are doing an amazing job! Good luck on your second date. That is totally exciting!


    DH: You really are good at doing what you do best.
    Me: What's that?
    DH: Making me happy. <3
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    #5
    That's great! I'm glad you and this new guy have hit it off
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    #6
    Good for you girl! I'm glad to see you're staying strong
    Double Ring Proposal 10/5/2011 made Augusta my MSOS wifey
    skp is my rockin' Cali pal
    No more ticker!!! Deployment #2 is over
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    #7
    Good for you It's a great feeling knowing you can finally move on and put it all behind you!
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    #8
    Good for you Lady!!! Now, delete him from FB and you'll be taking that next big step!



    "If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under." - President Ronald Reagan
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by decks89 View Post
    Good for you Lady!!! Now, delete him from FB and you'll be taking that next big step!
    I know I know...I should delete him, that will be my next venture!

    I did get on my computer last night and remove his posts from showing up in my feed...I was going to block him or unfriend him, I just didn't want to be like that...I was hoping we could be civil...buuuuut if he doesn't think I can see his stuff...it would take some of the satisfaction away from him I suppose


    It feels really good to be able to ignore his texts...especially since I know if I had responded we would have ended up talking or he would have left me feeling sad again...and then I would be right back where I started...SAD!!

    I have too many great things going on in my life to let him bring me down again...I am out dating and meeting new guys and I am having a great time doing it!

    I never thought I would feel this good
  10. Oh Dude, I knew you could pick up chicks in a tank
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    #10
    Way to go with ignoring his texts!! Keep taking great care of yourself.
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