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Thread: I'm starting to get tired of being so confused...

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    #1

    I'm starting to get tired of being so confused...

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    So on a first note, i am totally over xDF. Now to work on getting his stuff out of my house.... but thats another story....

    Background: I have a really good friend, M, like best friend kind of friend, knows everything about me. and i am over at his house pretty much everyday (he lives with my old roommate, and two other girls who lived on our floor last year)

    Anyways, I'm getting sick of being confused as to whether M likes me or not! A few weeks ago, i slept in his bed two nights in a row. no, we didn't really do anything, just cuddled, and kissed, and tickled (he loves tickling me), and slept. I've never seen that side of him, so it was kind of surprising.... but we didn't ever talk about it, outside of those two nights. except tonight, lots of tickling going on , i was on the couch sitting next to him, kind of falling asleep, and he put his hand on my thigh for a good long minute, and other whatnot....

    now, hes also trying to get with this other girl, who i have yet to meet... and hes like moving real slow with her, like will not ask her out! and just hangs out and talks with her when at school. he kind of talks about her around me, but not often, and i don't ask.

    so i am super beyond confused.... i feel like he has some sort of feelings but doesn't want to admit it...

    anyways, that was just my vent/putting down my confusion. thanks for reading
    R.I.P. My Love, Everyone was supposed to come home together, I'm sorry you had to come home early
  2. be silly. be honest. be kind.
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    #2
    Hope everything works out for you! Glad you're in a better place

    "The purpose of life is not to simply be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well."
    - Ralph Waldo Emerson

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    #3
    just flat out ask him about his feelings towards you. as for the other girl, who knows it could be completely innocent. it doesnt hurt to ask.
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    #4
    You should sit down and talk to him about the mixed signals, it's very possible he thinks that you & him could maybe have a 'friends with benefits' situations going on... I hope things work out for you. But the only way to find out if he's into you or not is to ask him- nobody else knows! Good luck!



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    #5
    I agree you need to talk to him. I wouldn't want for him to take advantage of you in any way and then get together with this other girl. I, for one, do not believe in "friends with benefits" whatsoever.
    Talk to him about it and see where you both stand
  6. Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
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    #6
    I definitely agree with talking to him. It sounds like he just wants to be friends if you guys have slept together and never went beyond kissing, and he's doing platonic stuff like tickling, and also because he's talking to you about a girl he is trying to ask out. But he could just be really shy and waiting for you to make the next move ... no way to find out unless you discuss it with him.
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Tojai View Post
    I definitely agree with talking to him. It sounds like he just wants to be friends if you guys have slept together and never went beyond kissing, and he's doing platonic stuff like tickling, and also because he's talking to you about a girl he is trying to ask out. But he could just be really shy and waiting for you to make the next move ... no way to find out unless you discuss it with him.
    ditto..there's always the chance though OP that he just sees you as a friend.
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    Thanks ladies!

    Quote Originally Posted by foreverandalways View Post
    I agree you need to talk to him. I wouldn't want for him to take advantage of you in any way and then get together with this other girl. I, for one, do not believe in "friends with benefits" whatsoever.
    Talk to him about it and see where you both stand
    thank you, i don't think he would take advantage of me, soooo not that kind of guy. and yes, i know guys can be a**holes on the inside, but be great on the outside, but i've seen him be an a-hole, its not that bad. and on top of it, he lives with 3 girls, hes mostly close friends with girls, seeing all that goes on, teaches how NOT to act! (oh and if he hurt me in any way, he would get in really big trouble with the girls he lives with...)


    Quote Originally Posted by Tojai View Post
    I definitely agree with talking to him. It sounds like he just wants to be friends if you guys have slept together and never went beyond kissing, and he's doing platonic stuff like tickling, and also because he's talking to you about a girl he is trying to ask out. But he could just be really shy and waiting for you to make the next move ... no way to find out unless you discuss it with him.
    just for the record, M does not have sex, he stopped having sex a while ago, because he does not want babies right now, and has seen one too many friends get girls pregnant. So, ya, kissing is something, hell i don't remember him being in any situation where he kissed any girl in the almost year i've known him.


    hmmmm i know i just have to wait for the right time and flat out ask, i feel like im in middle school or something....
    R.I.P. My Love, Everyone was supposed to come home together, I'm sorry you had to come home early
  9. Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
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    #9
    Oh LOL just to clarify I didnt necessarily mean sex or progressing physically. I meant more having a conversation about a relationship or him saying he wants you to be his girlfriend. Like how you said he never talks about it afterwards.

    Anyway I don't think you necessarily have to flat out ask, and you shouldn't feel like you're in middle school ... it's important for adults to discuss relationships and expectations too. Maybe ask him out on something that's obviously a date, not just watching movies at his house or whatever. And then you can have a nice heart to heart without tickling or anything like that getting in the way. Tell him how you feel about him and see if he feels the same way.
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Dessi. View Post
    You should sit down and talk to him about the mixed signals, it's very possible he thinks that you & him could maybe have a 'friends with benefits' situations going on... I hope things work out for you. But the only way to find out if he's into you or not is to ask him- nobody else knows! Good luck!
    I agree. Find out his intentions. And get rid of exDF's stuff...LOL Message me if you want to.I miss talking to you.
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