Military Significant Others and Spouse Support - MilitarySOS.com
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 12

Thread: I guess its over..

  1. Senior Member
    AFwifeintraining's Avatar
    AFwifeintraining is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    304
    #1

    I guess its over..

    Advertisements
    Well as some of you know, my df, well ex-df, and i have been going through a lot these past few weeks. He needed a break, then i thought maybe he might have ptsd, which you ladies were right he was just he's extremely depressed and having a really hard time.

    He finally talked to me, and told me that he just feels too guilty right now for leaving me here by myself and making me wait on him. He doesn't deserve me and that he is no good for me right now. He wants some other guy to come sweep me off my feet so I won't have to go through waiting on him and all the bs that comes with it. So instead of being on a break, we're done for good.

    We still talk every now and then because honestly neither one of us wanted to do this, we still love and care about each other its just what he feels is best for us. And there is a tiny tiny chance that one day when he gets back to being his normal self again and isn't so sad and depressed, and he can look me in the eye without feeling guilty about leaving me and all that; that we may get back together. But I should move on anyway, thats what both of our parents and some of my friends that know what is going on have all said.

    We have been together for 3 years, engaged for a year and a half and were planning on getting married this summer. I've tried to get over him and have moved his stuff to where i can't see it when I walk into the room. I just can't get over him I just wish there was an easy button to push and make everything go away. And I feel like we're meant to be and there is no reason to get over him, but maybe thats just my heart telling me that.

    I keep telling myself, if you love someone let them go and if its meant to be they will come back.. so we will see. I haven't decided if I'll stay on the site or not, because i don't post too often anyway but I do like to read the threads

    So any advice on how to get over someone who you've loved so long and were planning on spending the rest of your life with?
  2. Today was a Fairytale
    LILLIE's Avatar
    LILLIE is offline
    Today was a Fairytale
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    RAF Lakenheath, ENGLAND
    Posts
    12,426
    #2


    Sorry, I have no advice since I've never been through it but lots of and I hope you find the strength to move on and find love and happiness.
  3. The name says it all!
    ALil2Naughty's Avatar
    ALil2Naughty is offline
    The name says it all!
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Loki's chambers
    Posts
    26,367

    #3


    I'm so sorry sweetie. I know it's not the same, but "G" (ex db) and I broke up last week. I've had to move all his stuff into another room where I can't see it because every time I look at it, it breaks my heart all over again. I'm so sorry you're having to go through this. I hope you feel better soon and I'll have you both in my prayers.

    DH: Thank you. ME: For what, babe? DH: For being you.




  4. Senior Member
    QB77's Avatar
    QB77 is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    7,617
    #4


    I pray your strength and your heart's healing.

  5. Senior Member
    norabora's Avatar
    norabora is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    JBLM
    Posts
    8,460
    Blog Entries
    2
    #5
    Oh wow...I'm so sorry hun. That's really hard. I wish there was an easy button too...but all you can do is day-to-day try to keep going and not let it impact how you live. Don't expect it to happen overnight, because you'll just get frustrated. I took me over a year plus a fling to get over my last serious relationship before DB...so don't push yourself. I hope it doesn't take you that long though.



    I'm Baaaaaaaack
  6. MilitarySOS Jewel
    rache3's Avatar
    rache3 is offline
    MilitarySOS Jewel
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    SJAFB, NC
    Posts
    3,333
    Blog Entries
    2
    #6


    sorry girl! im sure there are girls on here that can relate to you still and encourage u through this time!

    I <3 Thirty-One! Summer Catalog is here! Ship to APO/FPO Join my team today!
  7. Eternal Member
    heyyykooolaid's Avatar
    heyyykooolaid is offline
    Eternal Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Rural black hole
    Posts
    5,901
    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by AFwifeintraining View Post
    Well as some of you know, my df, well ex-df, and i have been going through a lot these past few weeks. He needed a break, then i thought maybe he might have ptsd, which you ladies were right he was just he's extremely depressed and having a really hard time.

    He finally talked to me, and told me that he just feels too guilty right now for leaving me here by myself and making me wait on him. He doesn't deserve me and that he is no good for me right now. He wants some other guy to come sweep me off my feet so I won't have to go through waiting on him and all the bs that comes with it. So instead of being on a break, we're done for good.

    We still talk every now and then because honestly neither one of us wanted to do this, we still love and care about each other its just what he feels is best for us. And there is a tiny tiny chance that one day when he gets back to being his normal self again and isn't so sad and depressed, and he can look me in the eye without feeling guilty about leaving me and all that; that we may get back together. But I should move on anyway, thats what both of our parents and some of my friends that know what is going on have all said.

    We have been together for 3 years, engaged for a year and a half and were planning on getting married this summer. I've tried to get over him and have moved his stuff to where i can't see it when I walk into the room. I just can't get over him I just wish there was an easy button to push and make everything go away. And I feel like we're meant to be and there is no reason to get over him, but maybe thats just my heart telling me that.

    I keep telling myself, if you love someone let them go and if its meant to be they will come back.. so we will see. I haven't decided if I'll stay on the site or not, because i don't post too often anyway but I do like to read the threads

    So any advice on how to get over someone who you've loved so long and were planning on spending the rest of your life with?
    Your break up is still new, so it's gonna hurt like hell for a long time. I had my first b/f at 14. I will always cherish that first love. I look back now with fond memories. No hurt, no regret. I will never forget him. Hopefully, in time you will be able to do the same.

    My previous b/f before I met my husband was distancing himself from me. We broke up towards the end of his deployment and lost contact. Few months after he got back from deployment, he contacted me and we talked for a bit, then again lost touch. A year later he found me on myspace and told me he was deploying again. He told me he still loved me and wanted to be with me, but didn't think it was fair for him to ask me to wait on him. I still had feelings for him and was torn cause I was seeing my husband (then b/f at the time). He asked me to write and support him in this deployment and that he needed me to help get him through this one like I did with his last deployment. He told me he'd make it through cause he had me in his heart. He too was going through things and was trying to deal with them in his own way. I ended up marrying my husband, but I too, still look back on this particular ex with fond memories. Everything I ever went through with my past relationships make me love and appreciate my husband more. So, other than time, I don't think there's any way to get over somebody. It just has to run it's course.
  8. Feelin' fly like a Cheesestick
    BethM's Avatar
    BethM is offline
    Feelin' fly like a Cheesestick
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Silverdale/Bremerton, WA
    Posts
    9,770
    #8
    I'm so sorry.
    Beth, Mama to Emmalee (12), Evan (9), and Ella (4 on May 7) (I really REALLY need to update my picture!)
  9. Air Force Girlfriend
    eternalflame96's Avatar
    eternalflame96 is offline
    Air Force Girlfriend
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    347
    #9
    I'm so sorry! Just remember that there are a lot of people who do care about you. And if it's meant to be, then it will work out, if not then know that there is someone out there that is meant for you. I hope you find that person soon!
  10. Senior Member
    AFwifeintraining's Avatar
    AFwifeintraining is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    304
    #10
    Thank you so much ladies for your prayers and hugs! And all of the encouragement!

    kooolaid, thank you for that. its so nice to know that i'm not the only one who feels/felt this way. A friend of mine broke off her engagement to her marine and i know a few other people who have broken up after long engagements and have gotten over them and never said another word to them or about them. I just feel like why should I get rid of the past 3 years of memories. So I'm hoping I'll be able to move on and either find someone else or we can work it out. Whichever it is..

    And stormy, I haven't been on here very often since this all started. But I'm sorry you are going through a break up too

    Every day it seems to be getting gradually easier, especially if I keep busy and try to keep my mind off of him. I haven't gone through a breakup in a while so this is kinda "new" to me again. And they definitely weren't this serious as this. But eventually, everything will work out.
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •