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Thread: Update: Since Text Msg Divorce.

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    #1

    Update: Since Text Msg Divorce.

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    So I posted when I first found out about my divorce VIA text message... I was conflicted about what to do (sign the papers, get an attorney, yadda!) I didnt sign anything, I got an attorney... Only thing I asked for was my last name back and "marriage counseling. Our trail went to court today. . . Good New & bad news. "/ I was granted "marriage counseling" Yay, thinking in my head - he'll finally have to sit down and talk to me face to face and tell me what went wrong and what happened, bad news- I have to go to North Carolina for the counseling. Now, here's my deal. . . Since September - I havent contacted him, when he needs to talk to me... he sends me messages on AIM, or calls me private- when he calls -- he is usually calling to tell me how much he hates his life and/or how drunk and how much fun he had @ a bar the night before or @ the time. Online-- he is either hot or cold- He hates me one day and the next day -- he loves me, misses me and CAN NOT Talk about us EVER because he gets a panic attack. "/ He tells me how much life would be better if he wasnt alive, I dont ignore it- I talk to him -- Never usually telling him how I feel, because I guess I dont want him to get more down on himself. So, I'm debating -- do I go... or do I just sign the papers. He could just be playing some big ass game with my head and I could waste the money and go there and he'll laugh in my face.. or I could get the reaction I think he USE to want to give me and it'd make things clearer. Who knows. I feel conflicted! Ive been told I'm retarded for even letting him do this, but I could of easily ignored him, just didnt. He's a good guy, just has some issues. He's told me about 5 times -- "someday we can be together maybe" usually all out of the blue. lol. I just laugh- because he's so random, but yet -- he hates me today, and wants me out of his life. Part of me thinks he serious- but part of me thinks he's bluffing and its his way of saying "help". who knows. Eh, Venting. This is all this was. I feel a little better.

    Gosh, Guys are weird. tomorrow would be 7 months married.
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    #2
    i would just sign the papers

    personally i dont believe someone who wants out of a marriage and asks for a divorce should be required to speak to the other person if they dont want to - having him ordered to do it just doesnt sit right with me

    his life may be messed up but they are his decisions

    i say get on with your life and dont look back, you may be looking for answers you may never get or might not like to hear

    goodluck... youve been thru the emotional wringer but you dont have to keep putting yourself thru it. i would sign and change me emails and phone numbers

    .... don't make me say good-bye and don't make me stay

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    i agree, i dont want to force him to talk to me, but he makes it seem like he wants to... since he still does. I'm going to just sign the papers, i personally dont have the money or anymore energy to do this anymore. Its emotionally draining. Ive changed my number & I dont think he has my email, and ive been perfectly fine not being signed online today! Big Step!
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    #4
    Is he bipolar? My ex used to do that after we split up. He would call me one day begging me to give him another chance, and then the next day he would call and would have rap music on in the background and would sit there and rap for as long as it would let him about how much he hates me and wished I would die. It had to do with drugs also, but honestly, just sign the papers, get it over with and let him go on with his life. He's being a big baby about this whole thing. And I agree, get your phone number changed and get a new AIM sn.


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    Arent guys just strange sometimes, but Ive had some guy friends who've had pretty crazy ex girlfriends too- so I guess the crazy door swings both ways. Bipolar- who knows. He was pretty dependent on pain killers for awhile, anti depressants and now anxiety pills. "/ who knows. I'm probably better off without him, the past few months havent been "that bad"
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    #6


    Have you talked to him and asked him if he wants to go to counseling or to sign the papers?


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    I think that you have every right to know what went wrong...but...I'm not so sure you're ever going to find out. Perhaps it would be best to just sign the papers and move on. It is up to you, and you need to figure out what will be best for you. If you think it'll be easier to move on with your life if you find out why he's so hot&cold, then try the counciling. I hope that you are able to find whatever closure you need to move on with your life. I'm sorry you're going through this.

    One True Love
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    Hugs honey but I think it's time to sign
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    #9
    this is going to sound weird... when he talks to me he NEVER EVER brings up the divorce or anything about the divorce. He'll ask why I'm sad and I'll say "well, duh... really.. " he acts like he has no idea. He always picks up where he last left off. "/ its so random of him. The last "real conversation" we had we talked about us... and he about died it seemed like. Said he couldnt "do this" or "stop", saying he was going to have a panic attack. I asked him "how cant you miss me?" his response was "i do miss you, i miss you so much it eats @ me everyday" but today-- he randomly out of the blue -- IM's me and says "i hate you" ... lol. I guess if its "meant" to be... it will happen. If NOT -- It wasnt meant to be. Right!
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by ProudGFofJames View Post
    this is going to sound weird... when he talks to me he NEVER EVER brings up the divorce or anything about the divorce. He'll ask why I'm sad and I'll say "well, duh... really.. " he acts like he has no idea. He always picks up where he last left off. "/ its so random of him. The last "real conversation" we had we talked about us... and he about died it seemed like. Said he couldnt "do this" or "stop", saying he was going to have a panic attack. I asked him "how cant you miss me?" his response was "i do miss you, i miss you so much it eats @ me everyday" but today-- he randomly out of the blue -- IM's me and says "i hate you" ... lol. I guess if its "meant" to be... it will happen. If NOT -- It wasnt meant to be. Right!
    That must be very difficult to keep your feelings in check when one minute it's too much for him to bear, and the next...he hates you. Is he pregnant?


    BTW, I apologize for the most definitly inappropriate joke. I do that sometimes.

    One True Love
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