My kid is coping? - Kids Coping with Deployment

~~libbydc~~ · 04-15-2008, 09:01 PM

My son rarely wants to talk to Daddy on the phone when he calls. He's six years old, and he always says no when I ask. It really bums my hubby out, and my kid doesn't give any indications as to WHY he doesn't want to talk. Once he said it was because he didn't want to cry, but that was months ago when it was still a fresh wound. He's kind of found friends and a routine here, and doing better as far as crying for Daddy, and saying he wants him to come back. He even left off the occasional bad dream that Daddy was hurt. He still won't talk though. Rarely... once every few weeks he will want the phone and chat him up big time, and hubby LOVES this, but most times he rejects him. Is this coping? Is this healthy? I am hopeless as far as knowing what to do for him emotionally. Hubby is a no brainer, but I forget how to relate to a six year old sometimes.

~~Donna~~ · 04-16-2008, 12:05 AM

I think it's completely normal. That is how my boys have always acted when DH is not with us. My daughter is a whole different story.

Proud_MPWIFE · 04-16-2008, 06:53 AM

I think its completly normal. My son is 5 and acts the same way, refuses to talk to him at all and will never get on the webcam.
He expresses his feelings in other ways, he wears military stuff around the house everyday, wears his botton of dad and writes and draws him pictures.
I know its hard to see, but we just go with the flow and hope one day he feels comfortable talking to him.
Does your son have any outlet on how he's feeling? Will he talk to you?

My girls are a different story also...lol

~~libbydc~~ · 04-16-2008, 09:12 PM

Thanks guys. He likes to write emails so I just encourage that for hubby's sake. He does talk to me, but I worry that maybe I'm not listening right b/c maybe I'm not understanding his 6 year old language. If I'm not listening right, how can I reassure him with right answers answers? I'm probably just worried for nothing. As long as he's talking I guess that's good right?

Too many rights in that post.

04-15-2008, 09:01 PM	#1 (permalink)
~~libbydc~~ Banned Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: waiting for hubby Posts: 679 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 0% Longevity: 27%	My kid is coping? My son rarely wants to talk to Daddy on the phone when he calls. He's six years old, and he always says no when I ask. It really bums my hubby out, and my kid doesn't give any indications as to WHY he doesn't want to talk. Once he said it was because he didn't want to cry, but that was months ago when it was still a fresh wound. He's kind of found friends and a routine here, and doing better as far as crying for Daddy, and saying he wants him to come back. He even left off the occasional bad dream that Daddy was hurt. He still won't talk though. Rarely... once every few weeks he will want the phone and chat him up big time, and hubby LOVES this, but most times he rejects him. Is this coping? Is this healthy? I am hopeless as far as knowing what to do for him emotionally. Hubby is a no brainer, but I forget how to relate to a six year old sometimes.

04-16-2008, 06:53 AM	#3 (permalink)
Proud_MPWIFE Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Perry Hall, Maryland Posts: 1,609 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 14% Longevity: 35%	I think its completly normal. My son is 5 and acts the same way, refuses to talk to him at all and will never get on the webcam. He expresses his feelings in other ways, he wears military stuff around the house everyday, wears his botton of dad and writes and draws him pictures. I know its hard to see, but we just go with the flow and hope one day he feels comfortable talking to him. Does your son have any outlet on how he's feeling? Will he talk to you? My girls are a different story also...lol __________________

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04-16-2008, 12:05 AM	#2 (permalink)
~~Donna~~ Banned Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: New Orleans Posts: 16,885 Blog Entries: 1 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 0% Longevity: 99%	I think it's completely normal. That is how my boys have always acted when DH is not with us. My daughter is a whole different story.

04-16-2008, 09:12 PM	#4 (permalink)
~~libbydc~~ Banned Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: waiting for hubby Posts: 679 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 0% Longevity: 27%	Thanks guys. He likes to write emails so I just encourage that for hubby's sake. He does talk to me, but I worry that maybe I'm not listening right b/c maybe I'm not understanding his 6 year old language. If I'm not listening right, how can I reassure him with right answers answers? I'm probably just worried for nothing. As long as he's talking I guess that's good right? Too many rights in that post.