damn the school system

[mandyb]

Hey ladies, It is always something with me , I know and I wish it were not but it is and I have to find a way to deal with it.
I called first thing this morning and found my son a therapist, he has an appt Thursday afternoon. So... this afternoon I went to the school early to talk with the counsler there, first of they have no military child support system there, her words were "we are a highly acedemic school and we have to pick and choose our programs, and since the base has family support groups, we do not do it here' the kids have literally no time to think about other things since we keep them so busy acedemically" I could not believe her words, it really shcked me. I told her I have him an appt for this week and proceeded to tell her what I needed from her (to talk with him) I talked to her about the fact that he has always been a A student and now only after 3 weeks of this school, he has b's & c's and she seems to think that is ok, well it is not OK with me, I know how smart he is and if they would just talk with him once a week untill he can get over this ,just to see how he is progressing, well her words were " well you take him to his appt then call me and tell me what they say, but we dont really like to pull them away fro mclass time. uggggggggggggggggggg are you kidding me, after all my family is going thru, the least they can do is cooperate. What is really sad about it is she said her dad is retired military...

[Taressa]

that sucks i would be PISSED.. Good luck with his appointment! talk to his teacher as well and the principle also fleet and family services can help you.

[Donna]

I would be demanding a meeting with her, the principal and his teacher. That is complete BS. My kids' school is ALL miltary kids and they take the time to provide counseling services. This life is hard on kids. They know that daddy/mommy is gone. But they dont understand the whole picture of why. and they shouldnt. good luck with everything, i would be demanding that meeting though.

[JavecT]

WOW i'm shocked at her lack of tact. She should at least express some interest in your son's well-being and future as a student!!! I understand its difficult for the school's to get too involved because of lack of resources/staff/time... but they should at least put in SOME effort to make sure these kids are coping and learning. good luck

[ilovemickeymost]

Originally Posted by mandyb Hey ladies, It is always something with me , I know and I wish it were not but it is and I have to find a way to deal with it. I called first thing this morning and found my son a therapist, he has an appt Thursday afternoon. So... this afternoon I went to the school early to talk with the counsler there, first of they have no military child support system there, her words were "we are a highly acedemic school and we have to pick and choose our programs, and since the base has family support groups, we do not do it here' the kids have literally no time to think about other things since we keep them so busy acedemically" I could not believe her words, it really shcked me. I told her I have him an appt for this week and proceeded to tell her what I needed from her (to talk with him) I talked to her about the fact that he has always been a A student and now only after 3 weeks of this school, he has b's & c's and she seems to think that is ok, well it is not OK with me, I know how smart he is and if they would just talk with him once a week untill he can get over this ,just to see how he is progressing, well her words were " well you take him to his appt then call me and tell me what they say, but we dont really like to pull them away fro mclass time. uggggggggggggggggggg are you kidding me, after all my family is going thru, the least they can do is cooperate. What is really sad about it is she said her dad is retired military...

I understand that you want him to do well in school, but he is having a really hard time w/ this deployment as per your previous post. So, I agree w/ the counsoler that it is okay that his grades have slipped a bit. It doesn't mean they will stay that way. Just think how hard this deployment is on you & then imagine if you were his age & your dad was gone. At his age they know that it is dangerous & that his father could die. That's a lot for someone so young. You mentioned that its only been 3 weeks. Give it time. As for her not wanting to be very helpful, I'm sorry. That sucks.

[Sk8ergirl]

I would not let this rest. Depending on your personality style, I would either call the principle and talk to her about this or I would get a meeting with the principle and the counselor so that the principle is aware what this woman is--ISN"T doing. I'm sorry this woman was such a blockhead. Don't let it deter you!!

Good luck
Laura

[HunnyBunny]

I would be furious! I know I have been slacking in a few things in my life because my soldier is deployed... I can't imagine what it does to the chilldren! My daughter is just 1 so she really has no idea yet. That is almost insulting what the counselor said... shame on the school system!

[mandyb]

Originally Posted by ilovemickeymost I understand that you want him to do well in school, but he is having a really hard time w/ this deployment as per your previous post. So, I agree w/ the counsoler that it is okay that his grades have slipped a bit. It doesn't mean they will stay that way. Just think how hard this deployment is on you & then imagine if you were his age & your dad was gone. At his age they know that it is dangerous & that his father could die. That's a lot for someone so young. You mentioned that its only been 3 weeks. Give it time. As for her not wanting to be very helpful, I'm sorry. That sucks.

thank you for your advice but I have to let you all know that this rebelious behavior was going on long before dad left, I know that it has gotten worse since then but we have been dealing with his issues for some time now. I am not one of those parents who like to put the kid on meds for bad behavior but I am starting to wonder if I have been in denile.
We have had 3 visits at the dr so far and he seems to think he can work him thru all of this, but DS asks so innocent with the Dr., nothing like he does at home, so I feel like I have to convince the DR. that he is not an angel. so far it is ok though, so I hope that in time things will get back to normal, I really miss having a friendship with my child. Ifeel like I am constantly on his back for something.

As far as the school goes I got a phone call a few days after I posted but it was from the other counsler and she told me she was going to talk to the principle about maybe getting a support group together and if she could not do that she would pull him out on a reg basis and talk with him, she said he will have to straighten up before she gets off his back, so YAY,, atleeast someone is willing tohelp.