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Thread: To move or not to move?

  1. Regular Member
    notkai12's Avatar
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    #1

    Neutral To move or not to move?

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    Hey everyone,

    I haven't been on here since my then DF graduated boot camp back in April. Well, since then, DF has become DH and he ended up getting stationed at Ft Wainwright, AK. I was with him all summer, until early August when I returned to WI to get back to school (I'm a sophomore in college now). I'm posting now just to seek some advice. Lately, DH and I have been discussing whether or not I should move out to Alaska to be with him or whether I should stay in Wisconsin and continue school here. Things have been rocky between us since I left, mostly because we aren't great at communicating at a distance. It's also been really hard for me to go out there and visit him because Alaska is quite a trip from here and I have to schedule travel days around classes and exams, not to mention that the flights are expensive. I've been having some trouble focusing on school because my mind is always on potentially moving there to be with him. I am attending my dream school right now, and my goal is to graduate from here. But DH plans to return to WI when his contract is up and go to school here, so we could always return here together and finish school...but it's hard to imagine talking a break halfway through my undergrad career right now too. Any thoughts on this would be appreciated. Thanks!
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    #2
    Quote Originally Posted by notkai12 View Post
    Hey everyone,

    I haven't been on here since my then DF graduated boot camp back in April. Well, since then, DF has become DH and he ended up getting stationed at Ft Wainwright, AK. I was with him all summer, until early August when I returned to WI to get back to school (I'm a sophomore in college now). I'm posting now just to seek some advice. Lately, DH and I have been discussing whether or not I should move out to Alaska to be with him or whether I should stay in Wisconsin and continue school here. Things have been rocky between us since I left, mostly because we aren't great at communicating at a distance. It's also been really hard for me to go out there and visit him because Alaska is quite a trip from here and I have to schedule travel days around classes and exams, not to mention that the flights are expensive. I've been having some trouble focusing on school because my mind is always on potentially moving there to be with him. I am attending my dream school right now, and my goal is to graduate from here. But DH plans to return to WI when his contract is up and go to school here, so we could always return here together and finish school...but it's hard to imagine talking a break halfway through my undergrad career right now too. Any thoughts on this would be appreciated. Thanks!
    How long is it until his contract is up?
  3. Senior Member
    *Palindrome*'s Avatar
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    #3
    First off and my DB is in the Marines, he's from WI and we plan on living there in the future!
    How much longer does he have on his contract? If it's not much longer I would say stay in school and contiue with the school of your dreams.
    If you ever need to talk feel free to PM me!

  4. Team Rocket
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    #4
    I wouldn't move, especially since it is your dream school! Having your own goals and education is sooo important. If you guys are having trouble communicating, maybe you could try some new things to feel close while long distance. Do you guys skype or anything? My personal favorite is playing online games together while voice chatting. Maybe you can send each other little packages? It's always fun to get mail.

    Anyways, you say your DH will be getting out after AK and moving back to WI, right? In my experience, things will be MUCH easier for you guys if you have already finished your degree and have a steady job while your DH is in school. My DH just got out of the military in July and I was SOOO glad that I had a career to support us while he figured out what he was going to do. It made the transition so smoother.

    Also, your chances of actually returning to school if you stop now are not very good. There are people who do, but statistically you are much better off if you just stay in and power through until graduation. If you did drop out for now, what would you do in AK? Finding a job may be very difficult and it could be very lonely and stressful up there. I don't want you to resent your husband if you drop out and can't find something to do in AK.
    WiggleWiggle~ is my Wifey
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    #5
    Do you have any history of mental health issues (depression, anxiety, mood disorders, etc) or any health issues that could affect command sponsorship? It might be worth looking into to see if it'd even be possible for you to get command sponsorship and if not if you could actually afford to move there to be with him without sponsorship.

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