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Thread: Almost Home and irritation!!!

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    #21
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    Is this for real? So. You’ve never met this guy but insist on doing so at his homecoming and then dragging him to see your whole entire family literally right after after you meet him? And your family won’t find this in the least bit....odd? And you talk marriage and love but you are not at the stage in your relationship where you’d even sleep in the same room as him?

    I have no words.
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    #22
    Quote Originally Posted by brahette View Post
    She doesn't need to clarify, she specifically says it right here - http://www.militarysos.com/forum/blo...avy-man-3.html

    Assumed somewhere there was a "I misspoke" statement".
    I meant, thought there had to be...
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    #23
    Quote Originally Posted by susbro510 View Post
    Thank you for the replies. I just really wanted some uplifting responses. One of you messaged me and it made me feel grateful.
    Quote Originally Posted by Allybeth View Post
    Is this for real? So. You’ve never met this guy but insist on doing so at his homecoming and then dragging him to see your whole entire family literally right after after you meet him? And your family won’t find this in the least bit....odd? And you talk marriage and love but you are not at the stage in your relationship where you’d even sleep in the same room as him?

    I have no words.
    I am a conservative person. My family and his family have talked frequently on the phone. My family thinks it's different and abstract, but they aren't freaked out about it. I found out that he's not coming to Texas because he has to go back before that anyways. I don't plan on sleeping with this man until we are married. I admit, it is a bit unconventional, but it is my relationship and I am very happy. Being apart from him for so many months helped me to have a deeper emotional connection with him. Meeting him is just the next stage. It's weird, but we both agreed to all these terms. I am not completely ignorant. This is the first time I have ever done this. To someone I have been speaking with for months and experiencing this part of our relationship on deployment, I can say, I am truly doing this all out of love. Why the heck would I do it if I didn't love him?? I have dated another guy a in the military a long time ago and let me tell you, it isn't all peaches and cream. This isn't anything new to me. The difference is, I am doing this with the right person. Thank you anyways, lady.
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    #24
    Quote Originally Posted by susbro510 View Post
    Thank you for the replies. I just really wanted some uplifting responses. One of you messaged me and it made me feel grateful.
    Quote Originally Posted by susbro510 View Post
    I am a conservative person. My family and his family have talked frequently on the phone. My family thinks it's different and abstract, but they aren't freaked out about it. I found out that he's not coming to Texas because he has to go back before that anyways. I don't plan on sleeping with this man until we are married. I admit, it is a bit unconventional, but it is my relationship and I am very happy. Being apart from him for so many months helped me to have a deeper emotional connection with him. Meeting him is just the next stage. It's weird, but we both agreed to all these terms. I am not completely ignorant. This is the first time I have ever done this. To someone I have been speaking with for months and experiencing this part of our relationship on deployment, I can say, I am truly doing this all out of love. Why the heck would I do it if I didn't love him?? I have dated another guy a in the military a long time ago and let me tell you, it isn't all peaches and cream. This isn't anything new to me. The difference is, I am doing this with the right person. Thank you anyways, lady.
    FYI it's considered bad form to delete posts. Your original post has already been quoted.

    I don't think anyone finds it weird that you don't want to have sex until after marriage. I think we're more concerned that you're making all these serious plans with a man whom you have never met. That can be extremely dangerous.




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    #25
    Quote Originally Posted by idratherbehiking View Post
    FYI it's considered bad form to delete posts. Your original post has already been quoted.

    I don't think anyone finds it weird that you don't want to have sex until after marriage. I think we're more concerned that you're making all these serious plans with a man whom you have never met. That can be extremely dangerous.
    Yep. Awkward at best, dangerous at worst. I don’t know why your own family is cool with any of this?
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    #26
    Making this about waiting for marriage is completely dismissive of what people have said. The concern is that you are talking about marriage with a man you've never met in person, and a man you trust so little that you even considered he might be trying to manipulate the situation for sex, not that you are not going to have sex until you are married.

    Also, I don't know how you can say out of one side of your mouth that you love him and think you want to marry him, and then out of the other question whether he's trying to just get laid, when I'm ASSuming you've made it clear you want to wait. How on earth can you supposedly love someone who you don't respect enough to trust his intentions, and who you fear respects you so little that he would try to create a situation where you end up doing something you clearly don't want to. Sorry, but that's not respect or trust, and it's also not love. It sounds to me like you are caught up in a fairy tale of meeting a guy in the military and falling in love long distance, and it's more about the story and the fairy tale than it is the actual person. I'm sure you won't like that assessment, but it's how you posts sound to me.

    But clearly, you aren't open to hearing other opinions on this, so I hope it works out for you.
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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    #27
    Quote Originally Posted by susbro510 View Post
    I am a conservative person. My family and his family have talked frequently on the phone. My family thinks it's different and abstract, but they aren't freaked out about it. I found out that he's not coming to Texas because he has to go back before that anyways. I don't plan on sleeping with this man until we are married. I admit, it is a bit unconventional, but it is my relationship and I am very happy. Being apart from him for so many months helped me to have a deeper emotional connection with him. Meeting him is just the next stage. It's weird, but we both agreed to all these terms. I am not completely ignorant. This is the first time I have ever done this. To someone I have been speaking with for months and experiencing this part of our relationship on deployment, I can say, I am truly doing this all out of love. Why the heck would I do it if I didn't love him?? I have dated another guy a in the military a long time ago and let me tell you, it isn't all peaches and cream. This isn't anything new to me. The difference is, I am doing this with the right person. Thank you anyways, lady.
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