Am I out of line for being so ticked? (language and kinda long)

[marinegf08]

So, DF got online this morning, his step mom (NOT his mom but thats a different issue) called to tell me so i got to talk to him and it was an ok conversation i guess. he said he was moving, i had heard from another guy in his unit last week where they might be going to and my dumbass assumes thats where hes going...

i was just talking to his dad on IM and apparently he not going to the safe place that i thought but to a more dangerous area...****ing great...im pissed SO pissed at myself for not asking, im pissed at HIM for not telling me...i understand he doesnt want me to worry but does he think im not ****ing going to find out from someone else?? and apparently he sounded good today cause he told his dad about some stuff he was doing why the **** cant he tell me that ****??

Before i found all that out i was already trying not to be pissed at the fact that he is so affection-less...he KNOWS me he KNOWS i need to hear nice **** more than a pet name when saying hi and a simple "love you" at the end i understand hes probably trying to distance himself or whatever to make this easier on him so maybe im being ****ing selfish but im pissed as hell right now at myself, at him and at this ****ING DEPLOYMENT!!!! im sick of it!!!

I was doing so well before this **** too...sorry for bringing down any possitive vibes going on i just really needed to vent to girls that will understand....

Also if any of you marine SOs know anything about MEFs let me know (and if thats against opsec let me know asap so i can take that off)

[SemperWife]

Originally Posted by marinegf08 So, DF got online this morning, his step mom (NOT his mom but thats a different issue) called to tell me so i got to talk to him and it was an ok conversation i guess. he said he was moving, i had heard from another guy in his unit last week where they might be going to and my dumbass assumes thats where hes going... i was just talking to his dad on IM and apparently he not going to the safe place that i thought but to a more dangerous area...****ing great...im pissed SO pissed at myself for not asking, im pissed at HIM for not telling me...i understand he doesnt want me to worry but does he think im not ****ing going to find out from someone else?? and apparently he sounded good today cause he told his dad about some stuff he was doing why the **** cant he tell me that ****?? Before i found all that out i was already trying not to be pissed at the fact that he is so affection-less...he KNOWS me he KNOWS i need to hear nice **** more than a pet name when saying hi and a simple "love you" at the end i understand hes probably trying to distance himself or whatever to make this easier on him so maybe im being ****ing selfish but im pissed as hell right now at myself, at him and at this ****ING DEPLOYMENT!!!! im sick of it!!! I was doing so well before this **** too...sorry for bringing down any possitive vibes going on i just really needed to vent to girls that will understand.... Also if any of you marine SOs know anything about MEFs let me know (and if thats against opsec let me know asap so i can take that off)

I know about the MEF... I'll PM you.

[*MarineBug*]

Uh no. I would never be upset at my DH for protecting my well being in regards to stress. I would love him more for protecting me. My DH would also tell the guys around him though to not pass info on to me because if he wants to its his job...not theres.

[browneyedbeauty]

I can understand why you're upset. But you just have to foster a desire to share in him. Let him know that a) it's ok for you to share the scary things and b) you want him to.

[BJo]

I am so grateful that DH never said a word during #1 deployment. I know it is frustrating now but in the long run you will be incredibly grateful for this.

[marinegf08]

Originally Posted by BrittanyJo I am so grateful that DH never said a word during #1 deployment. I know it is frustrating now but in the long run you will be incredibly grateful for this.

I understand him not telling me the bad stuff...its the stuff thats making him happy/getting him through this that i'd like to hear about...im just trying to understand hes dealing with this the best way he knows how

[my.hero's.mrs]

Deployments suck, period. This is a tough situation because it looks like you are frustrated from the deployment and perhaps may be letting the stress sink into your conversation with him. I will say that I can always tell DB is not having the best of days when he isn't as affectionate online or on the phone and is sort of distant. But I have found that just saying "hey are you okay?" and letting him answer in any way he wants without throwing more out there has helped tremendously. I never whine about his distance or question why he is acting funny. I just make sure he's okay as my way of hugging him and letting him know i'm still here. You did find coming on here and venting it out though..

Oh and IMO, please don't be upset with him for not sharing the scary news. Dads are dads...tough guys that the tough sons learned to be....well....tough from. So dads get to know the knitty gritty grime of the work our SOs are doing. You'll appreciate not knowing the bad things until he gets home. I hope you don't mind my opinions. I just hate when I see us girls all upset over these damn deployments. They effing suck!!!

[Gillian_Angela]

efore i found all that out i was already trying not to be pissed at the fact that he is so affection-less...he KNOWS me he KNOWS i need to hear nice **** more than a pet name when saying hi and a simple "love you" at the end i understand hes probably trying to distance himself or whatever to make this easier on him so maybe im being ****ing selfish but im pissed as hell right now at myself, at him and at this ****ING DEPLOYMENT!!!! im sick of it!!!

Awww hun, I'm the same way with the affection. I love to be baby'd, and I love pet names and I love it when DB gets all mushy with me. Like all the time...I almost expect it.

But he's deployed, so obviously he's under a lot of stress. Also, there could be other guys around him, possibly looking over his shoulder and looking at his convo's or what not, simply because they are bored. AND you know how guys are...they have to put on that Macho image in front of guys in their unit.

I know it was hard for DB, when I was talking to one of the guys he was in charge of last week, I was pissed when I heard he would call me "his chick".....

<3333 Don't worry, just try to understand and I'm sure that you'll get all the babying when you get back home! Do you have a dog? I cuddled up to my dog when DB was gone and pretended like he baby'd HAHA I know I'm lame

[~*~Katie~*~]

ignorance is bliss in my eyes this deployments kicking my ass too. I just wish It would hurry up and be over already!!! Vent whenever i feel your pain!!!

[lacy+chk]

Originally Posted by Mrs.Ordinance Uh no. I would never be upset at my DH for protecting my well being in regards to stress. I would love him more for protecting me. My DH would also tell the guys around him though to not pass info on to me because if he wants to its his job...not theres.

i have found that DF's parents often know more than me because they ask more pointed questions about what is going on that i just don't think to ask because we talk about other things instead...he doesn't want to worry me, and i don't want to spend my life worried...