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Thread: Relocating for job during DB's deployment

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    Elizabeth617's Avatar
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    #1

    Relocating for job during DB's deployment

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    I just found out that I may have the opportunity to relocate within my company to pursue a different career path but the new job is 600 miles away. This is coming at a great time because the DB is leaving and besides him, there is nothing keeping me back at home. I know this relocation will make the next year while he is gone go by really fast (nothing like a new job, a new state/town, and a new apartment to eat up some time) but I'm really concerned for when he returns. If I take this relocation I will have to at least stay there for 2-3 years in order to give the job some real justice. I know that my DB wants to re-enlist when he comes back so we don't even know where he would be stationed but most likely will not be near our hometown. I'm just worried about moving and being stuck there for when he gets home. Not only will we be separated for a year but possibly longer depending on where he gets stationed next. I feel like I should wait until he gets home. He says that we'll figure it out when that time comes and he wants me to take the new job. I know I should do this for myself but I'm just really worried.

    Has anyone had this similar type of situation? Or battled with their own career in order to go along with their SO's career path?
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    #2
    I'd absolutely take it. For me, until we were married (or at least very officially engaged with a wedding date picked), being able to take care of myself had to take precedence. And there are so many unknowns that it's not as though you can plan to be near him anyway, no matter what you decide.
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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    #3
    Take it! definitely look towards your future!
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    #4
    Quote Originally Posted by villanelle View Post
    I'd absolutely take it. For me, until we were married (or at least very officially engaged with a wedding date picked), being able to take care of myself had to take precedence. And there are so many unknowns that it's not as though you can plan to be near him anyway, no matter what you decide.
    if your not married make decisions based on you and your needs and no one else.
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    #5
    What is his MOS? Depending on that there are quite a few places he could get stationed that would make it, maybe not convenient, but not as difficult. He could always call his Branch and see if anything in that area will be open when it comes closer to the time.

    At any rate, I agree with the others. There are plenty of ladies here that have done the long distance thing in order to advance/begin their careers some of whom were married. On top of this deployment he could get an unaccompanied tour, or an overseas tour and unless you were married you wouldn't be able to follow on anyway, at least not easily. I know my DH was told this last go round that he was going overseas whether he wanted to or not because he hadn't yet and they decided he should.
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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by villanelle View Post
    I'd absolutely take it. For me, until we were married (or at least very officially engaged with a wedding date picked), being able to take care of myself had to take precedence. And there are so many unknowns that it's not as though you can plan to be near him anyway, no matter what you decide.
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    #7
    take it,,,, and do what you have to do for you.

    DH and I are living separately - not only because of my job but for other reasons as well, it is the hardest thing I have ever done but will be worth it in the end.


    you do not know what the future holds, live for today,
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    #8
    Ohh. That's a hard decision! I think it depends on where you are in life and where you see your relationship going. I'm in a similar boat.

    I've been job hunting in my particular professional field for about two years with no luck. To get the job that I want, I would literally have to move to another state. In the last few months I decided that I'm no longer willing to give up my stability and relationship for this particular career. Instead of continuing to job hunt, I decided to go back to school to earn another degree to open up my career options.

    Partly I'm no longer willing to move because I want to see where my relationship goes with my db. We dated for five months and then he was deployed. We're about halfway through that deployment now. We talk everyday and are at a similar stage in life where we both want marriage and kids, and I see him as being that person for me and I'm pretty sure he feels the same.

    So I'm hanging around here waiting for him to come home. But this decision is completely my own. My db has highly encouraged me to apply for jobs elsewhere in the country, since he doesn't want to "hold me back."

    Another happy effect of getting another degree, though, and opening my career options is that I will be more employable anywhere and won't have to be tied to a single field. More options = I'm much happier. I hate that feeling of being "stuck" and once I'm done with this degree, I'll be on much better footing and much more marketable. And much more flexible geographically!

    Anyways, that's my own experience. If I were five years younger I would get a job in another state. I was also much more optimistic and believed that the education I already had was enough to get a decent job. But the "real world" wasn't on board, lol.

    Good luck.
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    #9
    Take it. If your relationship is meant to be, it will happen, whether you're 6 miles away or 600.

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