
I am about to say something - and I mean it with the utmost kindness. The fact of the matter is, if you continue in that mindset, the rest of the deployment WILL suck just as bad (or worse) as it sucks right now. I am not saying that deployments don't suck, they do - but there comes a point where one has to choose between wallowing and climbing out of the suck. This is your first go-round, so you are in new territory, and that makes it harder to climb, but you will be so glad that you do.
To the second bolded - comparing your experience to that of anyone else, even when their SO is in the same place, at the same time, doing the same deployment as your SO is just bad news bears all around. Either you end up feeling like you do - or you are the one on the other side and can find yourself becoming the target of the jealousy of the others. There are so many factors that go into how much comm each couple has during these things. Did you guys talk about expectations regarding comm before he left? Keep in mind that even if you did, what you plan/hope for and what he finds once he actually gets there can require some change of plans. When it comes to comm, I found it best to hope for the best but prepare for the worst. If you expect none, and get some - you are grateful; if you expect a lot, and get little - you are disappointed or even angry.
You'll find your footing, but at this point it might require actually looking for it rather than hoping it comes. What I mean by that is - fake it until you make it. You may feel like sitting around, staring at the phone and waiting for it to ring - but you (and the kiddos) will do much better if you instead get out side, go to the park, play a board game, do SOMETHING. Sunshine alone is great medicine - add in some activity and you have a double dose of "starting to feel better". Set small goals for yourself. Things you want to do in a week, a month, etc - rather than looking at the deployment as one big, gaping stretch of time. Are your kids school age? Are you a SAHM or do you work outside the house? Are you/the kids involved in any organized activities?
You CAN do this - in fact, you WILL do this - even if it doesn't feel like it right now. Cut yourself some slack (ie the veggie pasta sauce and tv) but don't let yourself get too caught up in seeing the current situation as an excuse to sit in the suck.
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