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Thread: Cheating

  1. Senior Member
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    #1

    Cheating

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    I was listening to the radio a few weeks ago and a couple's therapist was suggesting to couples that if you only cheated on your spouse one time and there were no feelings involved that you should not tell your spouse. However, if it were an ongoing thing or you have feelings invested in the cheating then you needed to tell your spouse. What do you guys think? Should you tell your spouse if you cheated on them even once? Or do you agree with the therapist? And why?
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    #2
    For me personally it isn't about the number of times or the emotions or lack thereof - infidelity is infidelity and I would want to know.
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    #3
    Fuck that shit. If my husband cheats on me he better tell me so I can end the relationship, and I would always tell him if something were to happen. Cheating is breaking vows, and we take ours very seriously.


  4. Pour a little salt, we were never here
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    #4
    "If there were no feelings involved" ........I don't believe in that, at least not in my marriage. If one of us cheated there were feelings, whether they were feelings for the person you cheat with or whether they were feelings of not having your needs met your spouse. Cheating, for me, would not happen without some kind of feelings.

    So no, I don't agree. If my husband ever cheated on me, even if it was a one night stand, I would want to know so I could make arrangements to leave the relationship. If I cheated on him........well, I wouldn't.
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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by ZivaD View Post
    For me personally it isn't about the number of times or the emotions or lack thereof - infidelity is infidelity and I would want to know.

  6. the siren that sings you home
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    #6
    Cheating is cheating is cheating. No matter how many times you do it, or if there were feelings involved. DH and I were very clear before we got married that infidelity is a deal-breaker, and if he broke our marriage vows and was unfaithful, even once, I would expect him to tell me.


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    #7
    it would not matter how many times-
    I find out I am gone, it is a deal breaker.

    we told each other if we ever cheated we better keep quite and live with the guilt, if ya can't-- don't bother telling me just pack your shit and walk out.
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    #8
    It would depend on what type of cheating we were talking about. Once, DB had a crush on a girl that he would have never acted on and he told me. I wished he hadn't because it made me paranoid. All in all, I'd want to know because it would come up at some point.
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    #9
    I am 100% sure that any STD's or other risks he exposed me are not going to care if he had feelings and did it more than once or not.
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by ZivaD View Post
    For me personally it isn't about the number of times or the emotions or lack thereof - infidelity is infidelity and I would want to know.
    Quote Originally Posted by pftube View Post
    Fuck that shit. If my husband cheats on me he better tell me so I can end the relationship, and I would always tell him if something were to happen. Cheating is breaking vows, and we take ours very seriously.
    Both of these.

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