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Thread: Do you "let" your spouse do something?

  1. Darkly Dreaming Dexter
    Aunt Sponge's Avatar
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    Darkly Dreaming Dexter
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    Aug 2007

    Do you "let" your spouse do something?

    On another forum that's more for guys than women I read a post that was titled "Do you let your girlfriend go to parties without you..."

    Well - I was like 'let' ... like she's a dog on a leash and you have to give her permission ... and then, after reading a lot of replies that I interpreted as 'alpha male behavior' I realized that OMG that's ME

    I say "I wuold never LET my hubby do ___ and ___" ... Truely with the idea in mind that I'd actually deny permision and give a and think nothing of it.
    Others say the same things, too about their boyfriends/husbands ...
    But if it's about me/my gender I'm totally offended.

    Made me look at my views concerning my husband very differently.

  2. Banned
    goldilockz's Avatar
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    Feb 2007
    I ain't his momma. He's a smart man just as I'm a smart woman and we know what we should and should not do. There's no "let".

    The only reason we tell each other where we're going and what we're doing is so the other doesn't worry that something happened, and to make sure no plans had been made we may have forgotten about.
  3. Cookie Queen
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    Nov 2007
    Heck yes, he knows who rules this roost.
  4. Senior Member
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    Dec 2007
    We don't play the "let" game in our house. We are both adults. We don't own each other. There are times each of us will run something by the other, to see if it interferes with other plans, financial matters, or anything else like that, but we don't have to ask permission for anything.
  5. It's 5 o'clock somewhere!
    mraynee88's Avatar
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    Sep 2008
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    I have PREFERENCES about what I would like him to do, but I'd never tell him not to do something. Unless it's sticking a whole tuna sandwhich in the toaster (true story) .

    Seriously though... if there's something he wants to do and I'm not totally down with it, we'll talk about it and figure something out. Simple as that.

    I would of course be hurt if he went out and did things with complete disregard for my feelings. But, that would be his decision, and it would show me something about his character that I didn't know before, KWIM? Me not letting him do something, wouldn't change who he is as a person.

    That probably sounded all sorts of jacked up, sorry. lol
  6. I talk alot, it just never comes out of my mouth
    AnAopps's Avatar
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    I talk alot, it just never comes out of my mouth
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    Aug 2007
    The only thing that is currently running through my head, as something that he would consider, I won't "let" him do is buy a new gun. And the only reason for that, is because we are trying to save money right now. He understands why we can't, but still asks all the time.

    Other then that, there is nothing that we don't "let" eachother do. We may run things by each other, and we may voice our concerns about it. However its never come down to him or I saying " you aren't allowed to do ____"
  7. Senior Member
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    Sep 2008
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    I think we both have said "I would never let B do _________" but in all actuality we both know that we are adults and we can do what we want. If the other really doesn't want us to do something and we do it, we also know that there will be repercussions, BUT we can do it if we please.

    People just have a habit of saying "let", I dont think that many people in the world look at their spouse or SO as a child or an animal, that has to have permission to do something. I think its just a way to express that we would be upset if our SO's did something.
  8. Banned
    Bee.'s Avatar
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    Feb 2008
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    I let him do whatever he wants, as long as it doesn't involve sleeping with other peeps. :3

    He goes to stripclubs, bars, whatever.
  9. Damn, it feels good to be a gangsta
    jamiev's Avatar
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    Aug 2006
    we don't "let" or "forbid" anything. there are discussions, yes, and sometimes they get heated . but in the end it's an agreement, not any one person making a decision about the other's actions.
  10. Senior Member
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    Mar 2008
    Laughlin AFB,TX

    we just have a common understanding...that we came up with together, not one imposed on the other. so there is no letting in our relationship.
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