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Thread: Harder than a deployment?

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    #1

    Harder than a deployment?

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    Do you think being in a relationship with and waiting on an LDS missionary would be more, less, or equally as difficult as a deployment.

    A girl i knew in high school just got married after waiting for her missionary and another boy from high school just left for his mission. I didn't know much about it so I looked it up. I think the rules vary from mission to mission but basically they are gone for 2 years, possibly in another country, and they are not allowed much communication. It seems like the rules are basically, you can write about once a week, you aren't allowed to have phone communication with your SO but you are allowed to call your parents on major holidays, and some have access to email once a week. Aside from that you are cut off from the world.

    It got me thinking - could I wait 24 months without hearing his voice or seeing him at all? So then I thought, would that be harder then a deployment? At least if he was on a mission you would know he was safe.

    What do you think?

    ETA: I know "hard" is all relative and any time away from your SO is difficult, no matter how long or where they are, and you can't qualify the difficulty of any separation, but I thought it'd be an interesting topic to think about.




  2. Amy
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    I think it would be harder than a deployment, yes, because the length is longer and communication would probably be worse (than many service members experience in their deployments). But in a way it would be easier- at least you know they are probably safe. Also, you know that after the two years they're home for awhile- right? I mean, they don't go on another missionary trip within the next year or so- right? If that's the case, then the whole time they're gone you can at least tell yourself that this is it...you can't really do that if your husband is in the military. I go through deployments knowing he'll leave a couple months (at the latest) after he returns. So that makes it harder for us, I think.
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    Aren't LDS missions voluntary?

    It's pretty hard to get out of a deployment once you've signed the paperwork and sold your soul to Uncle Sam.....

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    #4
    Quote Originally Posted by LittleMsSunshine View Post
    Aren't LDS missions voluntary?

    It's pretty hard to get out of a deployment once you've signed the paperwork and sold your soul to Uncle Sam.....

    Last time I checked, so is our military.

    Yes, I do think it's harder than a deployment. I assume the LDS church has some sort of support network for the families who are back home (I would hope so), but I doubt it is as strong as we get. Plus most of us get weekly contact from our SO's when they're deployed, and our deployments are shorter.
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    #5
    It depends on the person I think... and the deployment and/or mission. A lot of those missionaries aren't in safe areas, so if my SO was on a mission in an area that put them in danger I would find it harder than a deployment just because of the complete lack of communication via anything but a letter once in a while, which is even hard enough because they keep them so busy. If my SO was deployed to the war in an area with a lot of fighting or had an especially risky job I would find that harder no matter what the communication was like.

    There are so many variables.
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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by petsparkle View Post
    Last time I checked, so is our military.

    Yes, I do think it's harder than a deployment. I assume the LDS church has some sort of support network for the families who are back home (I would hope so), but I doubt it is as strong as we get. Plus most of us get weekly contact from our SO's when they're deployed, and our deployments are shorter.
    Growing up LDS I can tell you that the support network from the church is very strong even when no one is on a mission. It easily rivals the military. That is one of the huge draws to the LDS church, the community. I didn't stay a member because I don't agree with them, but that is one thing I really miss. The sense of community and support I got from the church was always much stronger than what I got as a military SO. Of course, different people have different experiences with both so that isn't a hard and fast rule or anything.
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Wicked View Post
    Growing up LDS I can tell you that the support network from the church is very strong even when no one is on a mission. It easily rivals the military. That is one of the huge draws to the LDS church, the community. I didn't stay a member because I don't agree with them, but that is one thing I really miss. The sense of community and support I got from the church was always much stronger than what I got as a military SO. Of course, different people have different experiences with both so that isn't a hard and fast rule or anything.
    That is really interesting, and I'm really glad for the families. I don't know much about LDS so I appreciate you sharing that.
  8. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #8
    I wasn't trying to sound bitchy.

    I'm not LDS so I don't know how it works.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wicked View Post
    It depends on the person I think... and the deployment and/or mission. A lot of those missionaries aren't in safe areas, so if my SO was on a mission in an area that put them in danger I would find it harder than a deployment just because of the complete lack of communication via anything but a letter once in a while, which is even hard enough because they keep them so busy. If my SO was deployed to the war in an area with a lot of fighting or had an especially risky job I would find that harder no matter what the communication was like.

    There are so many variables.
    I wasn't aware that they could be sent to dangerous areas, which throws a kink in my pro/con list. Them being safe seemed to be one the major thing that would make dealing with the separation and lack of communication easier.

    I wrote then instead of than in my title and I don't know how to edit it and its driving me crazy.




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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by LittleMsSunshine View Post
    I wasn't trying to sound bitchy.

    I'm not LDS so I don't know how it works.
    I'm pretty sure its voluntary, although I think it is highly encouraged. I really don't know much about LDS at all. I had to google the mission stuff. I do watch Big Love though, if that counts as a reliable source of information




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