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Thread: Sahm's leaving the kids at home to go out to the store

  1. Darkly Dreaming Dexter
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    #1

    Sahm's leaving the kids at home to go out to the store

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    So this is a heated debate in my home right now - of all the stupid things to cause a problem.

    I am a Sahm - we have 5 kids.
    My husband works shitty 12 hr shifts alternating Day/Night. - He has a 4 day weekend so his days on/off never match up with the kid's school days or the weekends, etc...which makes it suckier.

    ________Debate:_________
    When he's on his days-off from work (after having plenty of sleep!) I REFUSE to take the kids with me when I have to go out to the store for some milk or bread (the simple things you know)

    I wake at 5:30 every day - go to bed whenever I finally go to bed and often I don't even see my hubby (example - when he works the night shift) and after endless days of nothing but the kids and me I DON'T want to turn a quick 30 minute trip (on his day off) to the store into a dramatic hour and a half of getting kids dressed-out-and then battling the questions of "can I have this? Can I have that?" The whole time. (I do this all the time when he's at work! I hit the commissary, shopette, BPX, and even all the Dr's visits WITHOUT my hubby - WITH all the kids - at the least I always have 3 kids with me. At most I have all 5 - only the two older ones are in school)

    I think I deserve a bit of a break every now and then - especially since the only break I ask for is a total of 30 minutes every now and then.


    _____________Vent:_______________
    Well - my hubby's pissed with me right now because he woke up (at 10:00 am - he's welcome for me allowing him to sleep in, btw, though he'll never thank me.) And he realized we were out of milk - and so I was like "yes, now that you're up I'll go out and get some" because all we need is a gallon milk, right?
    Right.
    So then he proceeds to get one of the kids dressed 'cause she wants to go. (Mind you - he always takes one of the kids with him when he decides to leave the house because he doesn't get to see them that much, which is sweet)
    So instantly I go "Oh, I guess he's going out" cool - fine.
    And the next thing i know he's pissed with me because I'm NOT going out and I expect him to go out instead.

    *edit*
    I'll add that this is just a sudden issue - it hasn't always been a problem but suddenly he's annoyed with things being this way. LOL
    Last edited by Aunt Sponge; 05-23-2008 at 04:01 PM.
  2. i didn't realize that the USSR was back.
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    #2
    Unless one of the kids wants to go with me i usually leave them with Dh when I go to the store. he has never complained. and if all the kids want to go then I make him go with me or he goes. lol


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  3. Mommy of two sweet girls!
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    #3
    ha!!! Is your hubby PMSing?

    ETA

    My DH is pretty good with taking both kids so i can have some time alone when he has to do a grocery run. I hate to go shopping for food, esp when its just for little things. So i call DH at work to see if he can pick some up before he heads home. Works out for me.
    Gina~

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  4. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #4
    When I worked three jobs, I still took Liam to the store, but he was tiny.

    If I was in your shoes, with more than one, I would absolutely leave them with Dad for just a quick grocery trip. If an older child is responsible enough, I would even *gasp* leave them to babysit.

    I guess I'm a shitty mom, according to your man, huh?
  5. i didn't realize that the USSR was back.
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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Loretta View Post
    When I worked three jobs, I still took Liam to the store, but he was tiny.

    If I was in your shoes, with more than one, I would absolutely leave them with Dad for just a quick grocery trip. If an older child is responsible enough, I would even *gasp* leave them to babysit.

    I guess I'm a shitty mom, according to your man, huh?
    when I go down the street my ODD will stay home if Dh isn't home. no way am i dragging everyone down to the store when all i need is a gallon of milk. and i guess i too am a shitty mom for doing that too. lol


    I will miss you SOS...
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  6. Senior Member
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    #6
    LOL I only have one kid and I leave her at home with DH to go to the store whenever the opportunity arises. I'm usually like, "hey I'm going uptown" and walking out the door as I'm saying it. That way there is no protest.



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    #7
    I sometimes use our grocery trips as one on one time with one child. So, I try to take one and leave the other two at home. But there is no way in HELL I would take all three of them with me if Jason was just sitting here at the house. NO WAY One, MAYBE two, is my total limit. I'm here with them like 12 hours a day ALL day with ALL three of them by myself, AT LEAST five days a week. So, he can take over for me while I need to run to the store. If he dared to bitch, I would probably bite him where it really hurts
  8. Death Before Decaf!!
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    #8
    I don't understand his beef. He's their parent too.

    You definately deserve an occasional trip to the store in peace.
    "Wine is proof that God loves us and wants to see us happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin~
  9. Twin Wrangler Extraordinaire
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    #9
    My ex-husband felt the twins were my responsibility 24/7, even though I worked the graveyard shift full time. He wouldn't watch them for me to do laundry, clean, go to the store, sleep, eat.. nothing. And they are HIS kids.

    Needless to say, he's my EX husband.

    My current husband, I give him a choice: Stay here with the kids or go to the store. He alternates which one he chooses, and if he does run to the store for me, he doesn't dawdle.
  10. Senior Member
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    #10
    I have 2 and usually leave them home with DH when he is home. But when I have to take them with me right after work, it's always chaotic, and thats just 2, I can't imagine having 5 and having to take them. I see your point and sympathize with you. Maybe he's just having a bad day.
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