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Thread: Should a child's decisions ever put the parent's career in jeapordy?

  1. Darkly Dreaming Dexter
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    #1

    Should a child's decisions ever put the parent's career in jeapordy?

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    If you worked long and hard for something your whole life and your teenager did something that went against your lifelong focus - should your teenager's actions give reason for you to be fired/forced from you job in any way?


    My brief story/food for thought:
    My father's a minister. I was pregnant when I was 17 and still at home. My Dad HAD to tell everyone in the entire church and they VOTED on whether they wanted him to keep preaching there or not.

    To this day that still shocks me. I never imagine that my stupid choices EVER could affect my father's career as a minister. But they sure did. Now, fortunately, they didn't seem to care much and he stayed there for several more years - but, still, that's just shocked the crap out of me.

    I always felt that was wrong - WAY wrong and, actually, very unChristian.
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    #2
    Honestly, I think that a child's action should not effect a parents career..I agree with you about how wrong it was & unChristian
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    #3
    No, the child's decision should not effect the parents work.

    In the case you mentioned, isn't it taught in the Bible to love and forgive and confort? How is that loving and forgiving? Yes, the church could have said "we are not happy with the choice your daughter made" but that shouldn't effect his job. It's like the story in the Bible where the woman was an adulturous and they wanted to stone her, then Jesus came up and said "let those of you who have not sinned be the first to throw the stone" and no one threw a stone, then Jesus ended up forgiving the woman. *at leat that's how I remember reading it, I don't have time to look it up.
    Out of all those people voting on your dad's right to continue preaching, how many of them do you think had never made a "wrong choice" or whose children had never "wrong choice"??
    Katie- Mommy to Kylee 10-30-05 (loving big sister, Ms. independent, intelligent, princess) and Auriana 09-17-08 (miracle baby with down syndrome, heart defects, hearing impairment, digestive problems, tube fed since birth, but determined to succeed, strong, loving, happy)

    Ask me about Congenital Heart Defects... 1 in 100, it could be your child...

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  4. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #4
    I dont think your actions should affect your father career in your instance.
    I find it would be more Christian if the Community gave support instead.

    Another scenario is if a child puts the parents at risk through spreading confidential information about the parent or their collegues who might be working in a secure invironment.
    Then the parent might have to consider a career change.
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    #5
    Welcome to military life. As dependents, the decisions we make have the potential to affect our SO's job on a daily basis. I really dont see any difference.
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    #6
    I think if the decisions of your child affect your ability to do your job, than Yes, it should have an affect on your career. As Donna stated, dependents actions can affect a military members career. If you (in general) can't manage your family, then why would the military/clergy want to entrust a command/congregation to you?

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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Donna View Post
    Welcome to military life. As dependents, the decisions we make have the potential to affect our SO's job on a daily basis. I really dont see any difference.
    Quote Originally Posted by parkwoodmom View Post
    I think if the decisions of your child affect your ability to do your job, than Yes, it should have an affect on your career. As Donna stated, dependents actions can affect a military members career. If you (in general) can't manage your family, then why would the military/clergy want to entrust a command/congregation to you?
    I agree with both of these statements


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  8. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #8
    In the case that you stated, I don't think it should. What the daughter did wasn't a direct effect of the Father teaching. The church should support her. Love the sinner hate the sin. I do understand where they were coming from but to vote him out of the church is wrong. He didn't do it.

    Now, with the military, those are adults that you are dealing with. When their children mess up, as long as he is taking the correct form and letting the boss know, I don't see anything wrong either. When the mistakes are effecting his job, (time away, lack of productivity, ect) then yes, they should take another course of action and think about another job.

    Hope that made sense.
    "Obstinacy is a fault of temperament. Stubbornness and Intolerance of contradiction result from a special kind of Egotism, which elevates above everything else the pleasure of its own autonomous intellect, to which others must bow.: Carl von Clausewitz
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    #9
    at certain ages and with certain careers then yes. if it is an "adult age" kid like 18, then heck no. there comes a time where your kids have to accept responsiblity for their own actions. this whole "it goes back to the parents" doesn't fly when they are old enough to know better.
  10. IYAOYAS
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    #10
    JMO but I think parents should be responsable for what their kids do while they are living with them.
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