question from a GF

[KateTheGreat]

As you know military girlfriends "don't exist" and from what i've been told we're not really welcome in the FRG. Any suggestions from you ladies for an alternative?

thanks in advance!

[LittleMsSunshine]

Originally Posted by KateTheGreat As you know military girlfriends "don't exist" and from what i've been told we're not really welcome in the FRG. Any suggestions from you ladies for an alternative? thanks in advance!

I had the same problem the first time DB was out to sea. My best advice is to befriend one of his buddies wives.... and get the inside scoop from her

That's what I did... I made friends with a wife from DB's boat. Most of the wives from his boat are so we had our own fun. We made paper chains with one link for every day till they came home.... and worked on care packages together... all kinds of stuff.

The military really isn't gonna give you squat as a GF. I've discovered that it's much easier if you just take it for yourself Get creative!!!!

[KateTheGreat]

oh yeah, I know the military won't give GF's squat. Only problem is DB is.. asocial? He socializes but i'm not really down here enough to befriend any of his buddies wives. I'll keep it in mind though!
I'm pretty creative, I was just curious of suggestions. Thanks so much! Keep em comin!

[peatys girl]

First off: I am really sorry that they don't welcome you. Not all FRG's are like that.

Maybe your DB can talk to one of his married buddies and explain the situation about the FRG and hopefully his buddy's wife would possibly send you an email or reach out to you.

[KateTheGreat]

ha! Peatys girl, you're a genius! you would think that would be totally obvious to me! Great Idea!

[Coastie's Grrrl]

My DB is the junior officer of his unit and they are reserves to boot, so there is NO support for me while he is away. I hadn't really thought about the whole rank thing too much but DB told me that he thinks some of the enlisted guys wives won't socialize with the officer's wives and vice-versa. Some of the wives from his unit were pretty snotty to me at a meeting (being the GF is tough- even though we have been together longer than most of the married folks in his unit!) and of course I have no military ID to get support on any of the bases nearby but I have been reaching out on here and through some people at work who are married to the military and it's been helpful.
My biggest supporter?? A friend of mine and DB's (for 10 years) who just happens to be enlisted in the same unit but hasn't deployed yet. She is great!! She has been able to get DB's holiday box sent with the unit supplies so it'll be there tomorrow and she even arranged for another person who is being sent there tomorrow to take a bunch of frozen food that I have been making for DB. She and I go shopping at the bases and go to lunch every few weeks too. What a lifesaver!!!

[forensicangel]

Originally Posted by wagrrrl My DB is the junior officer of his unit and they are reserves to boot, so there is NO support for me while he is away. I hadn't really thought about the whole rank thing too much but DB told me that he thinks some of the enlisted guys wives won't socialize with the officer's wives and vice-versa. Some of the wives from his unit were pretty snotty to me at a meeting (being the GF is tough- even though we have been together longer than most of the married folks in his unit!) and of course I have no military ID to get support on any of the bases nearby but I have been reaching out on here and through some people at work who are married to the military and it's been helpful. My biggest supporter?? A friend of mine and DB's (for 10 years) who just happens to be enlisted in the same unit but hasn't deployed yet. She is great!! She has been able to get DB's holiday box sent with the unit supplies so it'll be there tomorrow and she even arranged for another person who is being sent there tomorrow to take a bunch of frozen food that I have been making for DB. She and I go shopping at the bases and go to lunch every few weeks too. What a lifesaver!!!

Sometimes the officer wives don't socialize with the enlisted wives because officers can get their asses handed to them if its found out that they are socializing with enlisted, and this transfers to their family. You are your spouse's rank. (Dad used to tell me this all the time, its real strict sometimes)

[Coastie's Grrrl]

Originally Posted by forensicangel Sometimes the officer wives don't socialize with the enlisted wives because officers can get their asses handed to them if its found out that they are socializing with enlisted, and this transfers to their family. You are your spouse's rank. (Dad used to tell me this all the time, its real strict sometimes)

I guess I get this but why did they have to be so damn *****y to me??? The group was mostly (in fact I think all) enlisted wives. One of them actually snatched the list of e-mail addresses that was being compiled out of my hands and said that is was for WIVES... I didn't say what I
was thinking (DB asked me what I said- he knows me...) but I also didn't stay for the rest of the meeting...
It is interesting- my DB is an officer but my dad was Master Sgt. in the Army!!! DB totally respects him though- and my dad is thrilled to finally have a "son in the military" (he has 6 daughters, and none of us are in the military..)
Oh well, I have found some of my own support... who needs the bi-atches???

[JLo]

I am appalled that wives would treat girlfriends like this. To me if you are cool I am going to hang out. I dont want to be known as a "navywife". I am Jennifer. This is why I dont make friends that are navywives because of this ****. I just cannot believe that women do this crap to eachother.

I am so sorry you girlfriends have to go through this crap. Its hard enough to go through a deployment without having the support.

[usmc_wifey85]

Originally Posted by JenJen2002 I am appalled that wives would treat girlfriends like this. To me if you are cool I am going to hang out. I dont want to be known as a "navywife". I am Jennifer. This is why I dont make friends that are navywives because of this ****. I just cannot believe that women do this crap to eachother. I am so sorry you girlfriends have to go through this crap. Its hard enough to go through a deployment without having the support.

I agree!!! Wives or GF's we're all in the same boat yet there are so many cliques that go on within the military no matter what branch you are. I swear its just like high school, I thought I was out of there back in 04' but I guess I was wrong.