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Thread: How many ways can this paragraph be broken down?

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    #1

    How many ways can this paragraph be broken down?

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    An experimental game, if you will. Using punctuation marks, let's see how many times the below text can be broken down into a somewhat logical story:


    i have been trying for a decade to bring him down i really like him and i really want to date him he has beautiful green eyes but he likes to shake his behind because his behind is so round but then i run behind his behind and he likes that i run behind his behind to watch the cars as they drive by the time we enter the diner i am totally hungry and i want to eat but i cant eat since i am not sure how many calories are in a donut do you know if i can have half a donut then i will be okay i ate pancakes and now i am stuffed so i look into his beautiful green eyes and i am lost in fact i forgot where i was so i pulled out my gps and did a quick seach for directions press go and then i went home and slept until the cows came home.

    Know what I mean?
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    #2
    I have been trying for a decade to bring him down. I really like him and I really want to date him, he has beautiful green eyes but he likes to shake his behind because his behind is so round! but then i run behind his behind and he likes that i run behind his behind to watch the cars as they drive by the time we enter the diner i am totally hungry and i want to eat but i cant eat since i am not sure how many calories are in a donut do you know if i can have half a donut then i will be okay i ate pancakes and now i am stuffed so i look into his beautiful green eyes and i am lost in fact i forgot where i was so i pulled out my gps and did a quick seach for directions press go and then i went home and slept until the cows came home.


    I give up. This is just a juvenile mess to begin with (I did two sentances. )

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    #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Serpentine View Post
    I have been trying for a decade to bring him down. I really like him and I really want to date him, he has beautiful green eyes but he likes to shake his behind because his behind is so round! but then i run behind his behind and he likes that i run behind his behind to watch the cars as they drive by the time we enter the diner i am totally hungry and i want to eat but i cant eat since i am not sure how many calories are in a donut do you know if i can have half a donut then i will be okay i ate pancakes and now i am stuffed so i look into his beautiful green eyes and i am lost in fact i forgot where i was so i pulled out my gps and did a quick seach for directions press go and then i went home and slept until the cows came home.


    I give up. This is just a juvenile mess to begin with (I did two sentances. )
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    #4
    I have been trying for a decade to bring him down. I really like him and I really want to date him. He has beautiful green eyes, but he likes to shake his behind because his behind is so round. But then I run behind his behind, and he likes that I run behind his behind to watch the cars as they drive. By the time we enter the diner, I am totally hungry and I want to eat but I cant eat since I am not sure how many calories are in a donut. Do you know if I can have half a donut then I will be okay? I ate pancakes and now I am stuffed, so I look into his beautiful green eyes and I am lost. In fact, I forgot where I was. So I pulled out my gps and did a quick seach for directions, press go, and then I went home and slept until the cows came home.

    I hate this story.
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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by jennypage View Post
    I have been trying for a decade to bring him down. I really like him and I really want to date him. He has beautiful green eyes, but he likes to shake his behind because his behind is so round. But then I run behind his behind, and he likes that I run behind his behind to watch the cars as they drive. By the time we enter the diner, I am totally hungry and I want to eat but I cant eat since I am not sure how many calories are in a donut. Do you know if I can have half a donut then I will be okay? I ate pancakes and now I am stuffed, so I look into his beautiful green eyes and I am lost. In fact, I forgot where I was. So I pulled out my gps and did a quick seach for directions, press go, and then I went home and slept until the cows came home.

    I hate this story.
    Nicely done!
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    #6
    I have been trying for a decade to bring him down. I really like him and I really want to date him. He has beautiful green eyes but he likes to shake his behind because his behind is so round. But then, I run behind his behind and he likes that I run behind his behind to watch the cars as they drive. By the time we enter the diner, I am totally hungry and I want to eat but I can't eat since I am not sure how many calories are in a donut. Do you know if I can have half a donut? Then I will be okay. I ate pancakes and now I am stuffed. So, I look into his beautiful green eyes and I am lost. In fact, I forgot where I was so I pulled out my gps and did a quick seach for directions. I pressed go and then I went home and slept until the cows came home.
  7. One day at a time
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    #7
    I think it needs a bit more than punctuation
  8. Meagan. Spell it right.
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    #8
    I have been trying for a decade to bring him down. I really like him, and I really want to date him. He has beautiful green eyes, but he likes to shake his behind, because his behind is so round, but then I run behind his behind, and he likes that. I run behind his behind to watch the cars. As they drive by the time we enter the diner, I am totally hungry, and I want to eat but I cant eat since I am not sure how many calories are in a donut. Do you know if I can have half a donut? Then I will be okay. I ate pancakes and now i am stuffed, so I look into his beautiful green eyes, and I am lost. In fact I forgot where I was. So I pulled out my gps, and did a quick seach for directions, press go, and then I went home and slept until the cows came home.

    I say 22 times.
    Previously known as PFCCJCgirl.

    Oh, you left me with a broken heart. And now I see what I should've from the start.
    Oh, you left me with nothing but a kiss, And now I'm leaving you with these lips, These lips.
    Everything looked fine from here. Everything looked more than clear. But now you are gone, And I'm still here.
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by MarineWife0929 View Post
    I have been trying for a decade to bring him down. I really like him and I really want to date him. He has beautiful green eyes but he likes to shake his behind because his behind is so round. But then, I run behind his behind and he likes that I run behind his behind to watch the cars as they drive. By the time we enter the diner, I am totally hungry and I want to eat but I can't eat since I am not sure how many calories are in a donut. Do you know if I can have half a donut? Then I will be okay. I ate pancakes and now I am stuffed. So, I look into his beautiful green eyes and I am lost. In fact, I forgot where I was so I pulled out my gps and did a quick seach for directions. I pressed go and then I went home and slept until the cows came home.
    Wow, that was impressive!
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by PFCCJCgirl View Post
    I have been trying for a decade to bring him down. I really like him, and I really want to date him. He has beautiful green eyes, but he likes to shake his behind, because his behind is so round, but then I run behind his behind, and he likes that. I run behind his behind to watch the cars. As they drive by the time we enter the diner, I am totally hungry, and I want to eat but I cant eat since I am not sure how many calories are in a donut. Do you know if I can have half a donut? Then I will be okay. I ate pancakes and now i am stuffed, so I look into his beautiful green eyes, and I am lost. In fact I forgot where I was. So I pulled out my gps, and did a quick seach for directions, press go, and then I went home and slept until the cows came home.

    I say 22 times.
    Hmm... maybe I'll add this to the "game". You are permitted to add five new words to the story, but once those words have been added, they remain for the next person.
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